I Just Exposed the Secret For A Beautiful Inward Life
While your goal may be to grow your inward spiritual world, you can't do it alone. You are designed to be part of a community of followers of Jesus.
It’s no secret our family is a soccer family. Both Kia and I played growing up. Our kids have played soccer at some point — our boys through high school. We have season tickets to the local Sporting KC MLS team, and we’ve attended games worldwide.
My youngest son is still in high school (a soon-to-be junior) and is working toward playing in college. Where he ends up is still to be determined, so he is working hard to continue to grow in his ability as a soccer player and as an athlete in general. We’re halfway through the summer, and he has spent more days than not in some form of training.
While there are some sessions when he is completely alone, most of the time, he finds a friend or group of friends to train with. He found the secret to growing in the beautiful game is working with someone else…which brings me to the point of this post.
The Secret to a Beautiful Inward Life
I’m in the middle of a series on how we grow, not as athletes, but inwardly. How do you grow as a follower of Jesus? We could also describe this as cultivating the garden of our souls. What steps must you take to grow a spiritually beautiful and healthy spirit?
Last week, I began with the premise that the most important step in growing your spirit is intentionality. The desire to grow won’t alone be enough to kickstart growth in your life. A hunger to change may propel you into taking a step, but it won’t sustain you. Day after day, you must be intentional to grow your inward world. But, even if this is true, you must wonder what you want to grow intentionally.
As I asked myself this question (which I began to ask after reading a Substack post by Ryan Huguley), I added these three areas to be intentional in:
Community
Prayer
Scripture
This post will focus on growing your spirit through active involvement in a spiritual community. To be clear, I am speaking to those who want to grow as followers of Jesus, but I do believe this principle applies to almost any area of growth.
The Earliest Followers of Jesus and You
Let’s start by looking at the earliest followers of Jesus. What did they do to grow in their faith?
After Jesus’ death, resurrection, and ascension, the disciples began by meeting together and praying in an upstairs room. Then, they were miraculously filled with the Holy Spirit. This empowered this initial group of followers to flow into the streets and share the Good News of Jesus with everyone they encountered. It all culminated with Peter giving an impromptu sermon and baptizing around 3000 people!1
This is how Luke, the author of Acts, describes the next weeks and months of this initial band of believers (emphasis mine):
'All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord’s Supper ), and to prayer. A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders. And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need. They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord’s Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity — all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved.' -Acts of the Apostles 2:42-47 (NLT)
From the first days of the church, being in community marked being a follower of Jesus. Notice that it seems to be both large and small groups of community. They all met in one place (whether this was 3,000+ at once, it doesn’t say, but it must have been large groups), but they also met in homes (so much smaller groups than 3000).
To grow your inward, spiritual world, you need to be in a community. This could be in a large community at the weekend services of a local church, but it also means finding a smaller community meeting in a home, coffee shop, or park.
While this is a spiritual principle found in Scripture, it is also true in the world at large. I noted a recent post by Seth Godin in which he offered his opinion on personal growth.2 People who want to grow search for coaching or community.
“When it's possible to get better, embracing mediocrity isn't a useful strategy.
I'd rather have a surgeon who regularly attends trainings, wouldn't you?
Read a book, find a coach, organize a group.
If you're serious about getting better, you'll improve.”
-Seth Godin
Like my son is finding on the soccer field, you grow better when you grow with other people.
Let me close with these two thoughts on growing through community.
1. Accountability
After God created Adam in the Garden of Eden, God famously said, “It is not good for man to be alone.”3 This refers to the need for Adam to have a life partner, so God created Eve to co-rule the earth with Adam. Beyond a helper, Eve was created to keep Adam accountable, and Adam to keep Eve accountable. They failed in this charge when they both ate the fruit, and neither challenged the other to stop, but it was God’s plan.
When you partner with someone or a group of people, part of the purpose of that partnership is accountability. You hold them to their word, and they hold you to your word. They call you up to greater things, and you do the same for them.
Last Fall, Kia and I started a small group for young adults. We meet each week in our home, where we share a meal and study the Bible. It is the same thing people have been doing for the last two centuries (see the above passage from Acts 2). Kia and I are far from the target demographic, but we might be growing more than they are.
I am accountable to be prepared to lead the group each week. It’s typically just picking out a passage of scripture and pulling a few basic thoughts from it, but this group counts on me to have a plan. At the same time, they are accountable for processing what we are reading and being intellectually honest in how they consider the text. In addition to the “spiritual” part of the group, there is a form of accountability to simply showing up and interacting with one another — rubbing shoulders.
You are meant to do your spiritual life alone. You are called to be part of the community. And a large part of accountability is simply showing up.
2. Show up
One of my favorite people to follow on Instagram is Steve Magness. Magness is a performance coach who began his career with college runners and now has expanded his work to all sectors of life. In a recent post, he asked a simple question: “What is the best predictor of your grades in college?” His question mirrored what he asked about his college runners: “What was the most important factor in showing improvement over the course of a season?”
The answer was the same for both questions. Show up.
Those with the best grades in college aren’t the ones with a top high school GPA, high SAT/ACT scores, or even an advanced study method. The best students are the ones who most regularly attend class. The athletes who showed the most improvement over the course of a season are the ones who attend practice most often.
Anecdotally, I can tell you this is true with my own children. We spent a lot of money for my boys to be on competitive soccer teams, so we made it a priority to get our money’s worth. They didn’t miss many practices. While they weren’t stars in their younger years, as they’ve gotten older, they’ve risen to the top. At the same time, I watched other boys miss many training sessions (for legitimate reasons), and over time, they began to fall behind the curve. It’s not because my boys are bigger, faster, or stronger but because they practiced more and improved the most over the years of their training.
If you want to grow as a follower of Jesus—if you want to develop the garden of your soul—you need to be in community and show up regularly. There is much more to growth than this (just like becoming a top student or athlete), but it is a lead indicator of what will set you apart in your inward life.
Step into Community
My challenge for you is to enter into a community. If you are not in a spiritual community, the easiest place to start may be finding a larger church community. Begin attending services in your local area. If you aren’t sure where to begin or where to look, contact me. I’d love to help you.
If you are already regularly attending a church service, then go deeper. Find a small group in that church. It could be a Sunday School class, a Bible study, or a regular meeting in a home. Don’t join for the information; join for the people.
By the way, church is messy. You’ll experience hurt. People are imperfect. But if you aren’t willing to go through some bumps and bruises, your spirit won’t grow.
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Acts 2:1-41
https://seths.blog/2024/07/the-paradox-of-lessons/
Genesis 2:18